The Unpleasant Lunch
by Valentina LaFontaine
Summary: Jane Foster is invited to lunch at Loki and Sigyn's apartment. How will this turn out? Loki/Sigyn. Post Avengers.


**Prompt: Loki is up to mischief yet again. **

**Characters: Loki/Sigyn, also starring Jane Foster and Clint Barton. (Hints of Jane/Thor)**

**I do not own anything. If I did, Loki would be the main character. **

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><p>Clint Barton and Jane Foster arrived at the door of Loki's apartment. Jane looked at Clint nervously. He blinked at her, rang the doorbell and folded his arms.<p>

"You shouldn't frown." He said. "It makes you less pretty. You should see your smile."

"I don't understand why Thor wants me to make peace with Loki." Jane began. "He nearly destroyed our realm, tried to kill Thor on multiple occasions and he expects _me_ to make peace with _him_?"

Clint shrugged his shoulders and rang the doorbell again. "If it'll make Thor happy, then it's worth it, you know? Just smile, eat your lunch and leave, simple as that. And his old lady will be with him, so, he might be on his best behavior." He rang the doorbell again. "Where are they?" He mumbled. "I don't see why I'm dragged into this."

"Because I wasn't going to go alone and Steve had a date."

"Steve is going to get some afternoon delight?" Clint winked and rang the doorbell again. Once again there was no answer.

"Well, it looks like they're not home." Jane said joyfully. She turned on her heel. "We could just leave right now and-"

The door opened and a woman with her black hair tied in a messy ponytail smiled. "Ah, you must be Jane and Clint." She said. She was a warm looking woman, probably in her early thirties. She was slim, but full in her chest and Clint took notice. Jane rolled her eyes and hit him with her elbow. "Come, lunch is already set." She said with a smile and opened the door for him.

Jane and Clint walked in nervously waiting for some form of mischief to happen. The apartment looked normal. She didn't know why she expected furniture out of The Addams Family. The place was rather charming. They had a television that still looked shiny and new. It was neat except for the piles of magic books stacked by the loveseat.

"I apologize for the mess." The woman who Jane assumed was the housekeeper said. "You see, Lady Sigyn and Lord Loki had been up all night reading again. " She smoothed the front of her pants and held out her hand. "I'm Mrs. Robinson."

Clint opened his mouth to make a reference, but he decided against it and instead held out his hand. "I'm Clint Barton."

"Jane Foster." She said, holding out her hand. Mrs. Robinson shook them both and moved the books quickly. "Come take a seat. They'll be with you shortly."

Clint and Jane sat awkwardly down across from each other in the comfortable leather chairs. Clint cleared his throat to dim the heavy silence when he saw auburn hair walk toward the two. Clint stood up along with Jane.

"Hello there!" Sigyn smiled. Jane thought she was wearing what appeared to be a strapless shirt. All she could see was her pale shoulders. The closer she came the more awkward the situation became. Sigyn was standing naked with her long auburn locks barely covering her chest.

"Welcome. Have you been waiting long?" Sigyn said.

"We-uh-" Clint stuttered and tried to avert his eyes away from her form. "We-uh-Hi, I'm Clint." He said holding out his hand. Sigyn shook it and greeted him with a warm smile.

"And you must be Jane." She said, holding out her arms for a hug. Jane froze in shock. What could she do? If she hugged her she would be pressing her body against another woman's naked one, especially her lover's sister-in-law. And it was worse that there would be people watching. And if she didn't, she would refuse a hug from Thor's sister-in-law. It would be an insult. Sigyn let her into her home, offered her lunch, and now wanted to give her a warm hug. She couldn't refuse her gesture. She had no choice. She made slow steps over to her and hugged her lightly.

Her eyes flashed to Clint's who stared between the two of them. She narrowed her eyes at him and stepped back quickly.

"I'm so happy you made it. Come and sit." She said, sitting down on one side of the loveseat and crossing her legs. Jane tried to focus on the large snake pin in her hair rather than her nudity.

"Uhm," Jane said. "Might I ask a question?"

"But of course. Ask away, _sis_." Sigyn beamed.

"Where are your clothes?" Jane's voice was practically silent and she had to repeat herself when Sigyn frowned.

"Did you want to borrow something, dear? You mortal women do not have a lot of clothes that cover yourself from the weather-"

"No, no, I mean, where are _your_ clothes?"

"I'm afraid I don't understand."

"Why are you naked?" Jane asked bluntly. She tried to keep her cheeks from turning red, but it was becoming impossible to hide her embarrassment.

Clint held his hand out to Jane. "Ssh, don't ask that. I think it's good Sigyn isn't ashamed of her body." He smiled at the goddess.

"Thank you, Clint." She said with a wink. "I don't see why you mortals do not practice this. It's Wednesday and normally Loki and I embrace ourselves as we truly are. It's a custom. I hope this does not prove to be a problem."

Jane shook her head. "No, no. I didn't mean to insult you, I was just asking because—" She paused. So you mean he'll be naked too-"

"Good afternoon." Loki said, as he strolled in. "Pardon my tardiness. I had other business to attend to." Clint turned his head quickly and covered his eyes.

"We know how you like to keep busy, darling." She chuckled. "Now we can start lunch. Clothing is optional. Come along."

Jane's face was completely red and Clint's complexion turned pale. "We have to eat with them like that?" Clint said.

"You didn't have a problem when it was just Sigyn." She said through her hands.

"Damn skippy," Clint nodded. "I didn't think I would have to stare at Loki's junk while I eat."

"Like you had a chance with her."

"So, just because she's married I can't admire her beauty?"

"What?" Jane said looking up. "No, it's not that. It's—never mind."

He stood up and took Jane by the hand. "Come on. Let's get this over with. You can add this to your blog." He forced her to her feet and toward the dining table to lunch. She had to calm herself. She was a scientist. She studied other cultures for years and she should be more accepting of other people's ways of living. She was no longer the prude shy little girl, she was an open-minded woman.

She took in a deep breath, held her head up high and forced herself to walk into the room when she saw her assigned seat was closely stuck between Loki and Sigyn. Clint was right. She couldn't sit next to her enemy as he ate his salad and drank his tea in his birthday suit. She threw her hands up in the air and shook her head.

"I can't! We can reschedule this on another day, other than Wednesday!" She exclaimed before storming out the door. Clint smiled nervously at the two. "I am sorry, she isn't normally like that."

"It's quite alright. Attend to her. Mortals can be so frail." Loki said pouring himself some tea. Clint exited quickly to catch up to her.

The two waited in silence for them to both leave before they broke out in a hysterical laugh. Sigyn snorted and leaned to Loki. "Did you see how red her face was when you walked in?"

"I thought she was going to faint."

"Good one, my love." She said kissing his cheek. "I don't know why she was so embarrassed, I thought you look dashing."

"Nothing gives me more pleasure than to see you naked, flower. Clint had been eyeing you. Do not think I didn't see it."

"Mortals aren't my cup of tea. I'll take my husband over one any day." She said picking up her teacup. "To mischief." She toasted. He clinked cups with her they both took a sip.

"Next time, we see how badly she hates cockroaches when one pops out of her purse." Sigyn suggested and the two laughed again.


End file.
